How to Help Your Teen Stand Out in College Applications

Why Standing Out Matters (A Lesson from CrossFit and Doctors)

I recently got back into CrossFit training. After being a fanatic at OrangeTheory, I switched to Lifetime’s GTX program. For those of you who don’t know, CrossFit-style workouts combine high-intensity bursts that raise your heart rate quickly, followed by periods of rest and recovery. I loved the adrenaline rush that came with this routine. What I didn’t love was how it flared up my asthma.

It turns out I have exercise-induced asthma. So, time came to look for a doctor – and of course, who wants an average doctor for themselves? I’m pretty sure no one has ever typed into ChatGPT or Google: “Give me a list of average doctors for my condition.”

Instead, I searched for the best experts in Georgia. Here’s what popped up:

• Dr. A: Rated 4.9/5, known for being detail-oriented and compassionate.

• Dr. B: Also rated 4.9/5, featured in Atlanta Magazine three years in a row, awarded “Top Doctor of the Year.”

Guess which one I chose? Most likely the same one you would too.

And it made me reflect: What really makes someone stand out? Is it the awards and recognition, or is it the compassion and attention to detail that people remember?

If it’s the latter – and I strongly believe it is – then how can we give our children a head start in this?

That’s where college applications come in. Standing out is not about stacking on achievements. It’s about showing who you are, fully and authentically.

Here’s how you can help your teen do just that.

1. Observe Your Teen’s Passions – Especially During Struggles

Passion isn’t just what they enjoy when things are easy. The true test is how they respond when it gets hard.

Do they take action to get better on their own—finding resources, practicing more, asking questions – or do they sulk for a while and then move on?

That’s the difference between a passing interest and a deep passion. Sometimes you’ll only spot it in those tough moments – and that’s when you discover their true calling.

2. Talk About Their Strengths and Get Their Buy-In

You might see a gift in your child that they don’t see yet. But here’s the thing: unless they own it, it won’t go anywhere.

Instead of pushing, start the conversation: “I notice you keep going back to this, even when it’s hard. What do you think that means?”

When they connect the dots themselves, their drive multiplies. You’re no longer dragging them uphill – they’re choosing to climb. That’s when their unique strengths begin to shine in both life and college applications.

3. Go All Out with Real Experiences to Stand Out in College Applications

Once you’ve identified what lights them up, give them opportunities to explore it fully. Competitions, internships, clubs, volunteer work, summer programs – anything that turns their interest into a lived experience.

These moments not only deepen their skills but also give them authentic stories to tell in essays and interviews. That’s what makes your child’s application stand out from the rest.

A Success Story: How Maya Found Her Unique Edge

Take Maya (not her real name), one of our students who completed the leadership program. She was the kind of teen every parent knows – the one who seemed to have her hand in everything. She played piano and could glide through a recital with ease. She competed on her school’s soccer team, sprinting down the field with her usual determination. She even gave debate a try, memorizing her note cards and making her points with practiced confidence.

She did well in all of these. But here’s the thing: when a soccer game went south, she replayed the missed goal in her head and sighed about how she “should’ve done better,” but never actually practiced differently the next day. If she lost a debate round, she vented to her friends about what she could have said, then tucked her notes away without revisiting them. With piano, if she stumbled through a tricky passage, she groaned, muttered about how impossible it was, and flipped to an easier song instead of working through the hard part.

Then came chemistry. And unlike the other things, chemistry didn’t always come easily. In fact, she bombed a big quiz early in the semester. Her friends told her to just let it go – “it’s just one test.” But Maya didn’t. She couldn’t.

Instead, she spent hours replaying YouTube tutorials, filling her notebook with extra practice problems, and camping out in her teacher’s office for review sessions. When her mom walked past her room one night, she noticed Maya had ordered a used chemistry set online and was running her own experiments to really see the reactions happen.

This was the first time Maya’s parents saw her go beyond what was required – not for a grade, not for recognition, but because she had to understand.

That’s when the conversation began: “Do you realize how much effort you’re putting into this? What does that say about what you love?”

Over the next two years, Maya leaned into it. She joined the science club, entered a regional science fair with her own project, and later shadowed a pharmacist for a summer. By the time she sat down to write her college essays, she didn’t have to manufacture uniqueness. She told her real story:

A girl who was good at many things, but discovered her truest passion in the subject that made her work the hardest.

And that story – the one about resilience, grit, and genuine curiosity – is what helped her stand out in college applications.

Lesson for Parents

When your teen is juggling lots of activities, don’t just look at what they’re “good” at. Look at what they’re willing to struggle for. The subject, skill, or project they return to even after failure is often the one that holds their most authentic passion. That’s the story that will resonate in college applications – not just achievements, but the persistence behind them.

Final Thought for Parents

Helping your child shine isn’t about adding more activities or padding a résumé. It’s about uncovering what’s already there, nurturing it, and then letting them run with it.

Think back to my doctor search. I didn’t pick the physician who was just “good enough.” I looked for the one who stood out – not because of a list of credentials alone, but because of a reputation for excellence and compassion. That same principle applies to our teens.

Colleges aren’t scanning applications for the kid who tried everything and stayed on the surface. They’re looking for the one who went deeper – the student who showed grit, resilience, and an authentic spark in something that mattered to them.

Because in the end, there’s nothing more unique than your teen being fully, unapologetically themselves. And that’s what will truly help them stand out in college applications.